This Journey, The Fight.


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I’ve circled back,
To this moment again,
Rooted to this spot,
Waiting in vain.

Your eyes are shut tight,
You’re struggling to remember,
I look at you and miss,
That grey and dark November.

Such change is here,
Such distances are near,
The comfort of your words,
Has made way for its own fear.

Yes its the same story,
It is yet again, retold,
In silence we strive,
To smile in a life so cold.

It’s journey we’re meant to live,
Of stoic faith and solid hope,
It’s a test of courage,
Like when lovers elope.

At the end, sits a reality,
Meant only for the worthy,
Who’ve done their time,
Renounced pleasure, worldly.

It’s this life, here, right now,
Peace, quiet, and love  is all,
That’s left at the end of the fight,
To the finish line, even if you crawl.

Walls


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I lay brick over brick,
Laboriously I build,
Walls so tall around me,
So no one around can see.

I paint myself invisible,
I hide myself away,
Behind those walls, so mighty,
So no one can touch me, even slightly.

I welcome the night,
It brings with it the darkness,
A blanket, if you will,
Under which I can lie, still.

It’s not my fears,
That make me look away,
It’s the pain of my misery,
It’s us, and our history.

It’s the walking away,
It’s the breaking of hearts,
It’s how you tore me down,
Turned every smile to a frown.

It’s these walls alone,
That can keep me safe,
Away from the eyes,
Away from a love that dies.

I build these walls,
Brick by each brick,
To keep myself hidden,
To save me from the anarchy within.

A New Love is Born


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Face covered with my hands,
I look at you through my fingers,
A glint of mischief in my eyes,
The kinds that on your lips lingers.

A coy smile I throw,
Across the room at you,
You slowly walk towards me,
Make me feel something new.

Your warmth trickles down,
Right down to my toes,
This is nothing less than magic,
Magic or love, who knows.

Whoever you are,
And wherever you’re going,
You are here right now,
And that’s all that’s worth knowing.

A projection of my subconscious,
Or a figment of my imagination,
These moments to me are real,
They are the object of my affection.

In a cloud I exist,
On a cloud I seem to walk,
When you are with me,
The world just seems to stop.

Miss me, do you?
When I am not around?
Do you miss this freedom too,
In us that we have found?

Talk to me tonight,
About everything under the sun,
I will listen to your story,
As if it were a prize I’d won.

Tomorrow is so far,
So much further from now,
Life is now, live a little,
Love will show you how.

This life is long,
So much longer alone,
Stay with me,
Let a new love be born.

 

 

Darkness in Disguise


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At the speed of light,
This  puzzle is changing,
In a moment alone,
The shadows are fading.

Strength seeps back,
Into my hands and into my heart,
I suddenly see the truth,
All but clouded from the start.

Slow but sure am I,
As I begin to conceive,
Healing is contentment,
In the lessons we receive.

Some dreams that shattered,
Were just the blessing,
I couldn’t see beyond the tears then,
Mea Culpa, I am now confessing.

Leaving behind the many follies,
I ask for almighty’s kind forgiveness,
May today fairness be mine,
Interspersed with some happiness.

I’ll carry my lessons with me,
Bravely decorated with them I’ll live,
My badge of honor they shall be,
Until there’s nothing left to forgive.

One day when you will arrive,
You’ll hold my hand and sit beside,
We’ll know the truth and dream together,
Wont ever let that faith subside.

Love is designed to be crazy
Life is nothing without a fight,
Being with you is enough,
All I could want, if I might.

I came to you broken,
You fixed me and made me right,
Heartbreak is just God,
Disguised as the darkness at night.

 

A New Dawn


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Step after step,
We walk ahead,
Learn what we must,
And move on ahead.

Bleeding from our eyes,
And crying from our hearts,
We move away from life,
With a smile and nothing else.

Scars hidden deep down,
Hidden by layers of lies,
Only a smile to show for,
The broken spirit inside.

One face for the mirror,
Another one for the world,
We’re all just as broken,
As the glass beneath our feet that lies.

A clean white soul may arrive,
Such is our hope for redemption,
In our being we can’t deny,
The struggle for vindication.

The shackles of guilt may fall away,
The weight of betrayal may rise,
Half alive we can only pray,
For life to lose  its disguise.

Love believes its truth,
Is the only hope we live by,
Those who cant see it,
May in their own lies die.

One final time I close my eyes,
I’ll pray for a new beginning,
To wake up to the light,
Of a brand new dawn.

I Wonder


All my life will go by,
I will exist in your world,
Will you see me standing,
Right by your side?

You will have made promises,
Of solidarity and love,
If to me alone or to many,
I wonder if you’ll remember.

I don’t know who you are yet,
But one day when i will,
Will you be the same,
Or will the mask fall away?

I look strong and brave,
In my love and sacrifices,
I wonder if you’ll see,
If you’ll understand my weakness.

I see myself in your eyes,
Do your eyes voice your heart,
Or do I see a reflection,
Of only my own desires?

As the beat of the music changes,
The rhythm makes my feet move,
I fall in step with you,
I wonder if its you or the song.

Today, I’m but a girl,
Tomorrow, I will be a woman,
Will you understand the difference,
And love me, I wonder.

You’ll Be Fine


It’s a funny thing,
The desire to defend,
Another from a foe,
Unknown, yet hated.

A friend might love,
As unconditionally,
As would a parent,
Love their child.

It’s protective and defensive,
It’s easy and eccentric
This bond between,
Two friends like us.

You’ll push me to mischief,
Save me from its consequences,
Force me to take chances,
And mend my broken heart.

The urge to share,
Every moment of everyday,
Some incidents with mirth,
Others with remorse.

You are my witness,
As am I yours,
Our trails run parallel,
Right through each other’s hearts.

Secret-keeper, mystery-seeker,
Confessional, my arsenal,
I need no other,
With you riding shotgun.

You’re my team,
We’re two of a kind,
Wreck havoc on him,
On whom we set our minds.

After all these years,
I believe you every time,
When you look at me in tears,
And tell me, “You’ll be fine.”

Today


A little closer,
I come,
To you and to me,
Today.

I don’t know,
Who we are,
I don’t care,
I never did.

All I see,
Is  a breath,
Between us,
Shared.

A little warmer,
I feel inside,
Because of you,
With me today.

Hopelessly romantic,
I may be,
But the truth,
You cannot deny.

Close your eyes,
And open your heart,
For this day,
Will die tomorrow.

And tomorrow,
Will be gone,
With or without,
You and I.

Live for yourself,
Not for fear,
Nor for me,
But for  love.

My friend,
Be here,
With me,
Today.

And, I’m Scared.


When I feel a stirring in my heart, I’m scared.
Scared if its the beginning of something.
When my breath catches in my throat at the sound of a name, I panic.
I panic that this feeling wont go. Its a premonition.
A premonition of pain coming my way.
I cant pay the price of a beating heart.
The hollowness inside comes much cheaper and leaves a bit of me alive.
Helps me make it to the end.
I came here to live and all I’m left with is survival.
The complete annihilation of my being stares me in my face every second of every day that I let a sliver of hope look me in the eye and show me the possibilities.
I close my eyes, and brush aside the vision, turn around and run, run like the devil himself was hot on my heels.
The shadow of a hand reaching for mine, the mere idea, makes me shiver with repulsion.
It’s repulsive, the thought of you coming into my days, changing them and leaving.
Leaving me alone, incapable of the thought of existence beyond you.
This cannot happen to me again, not one more time.
The flimsy threads holding my bones together threaten to collapse.
To take all I’ve built down with them. This must not happen.
I must soldier through your spell and deflect your charm.
Words are misleading, actions  disappointing, promises are empty and love is imaginary.
This is my last chance. Escape and liberation are my only shot at salvation.
And I will not let them go. I will escape.
Because I’m scared of falling in love.
I’m scared, of you.

My Questions


How wretched is the one,
Who plans and plots,
To twist his destiny,
Around his little finger?

Is he better than him,
Who waits in silence,
For castle’s to emerge,
From time’s still sands?

Is life a painting,
Of our choice’s colors,
On our karmic canvas,
Are we nothing but artists?

What does it mean,
When lives are manipulated,
When dreams are masticated,
When love dies?

Do dreams become real,
Do nightmares dissolve,
Do midnight conversations,
Still make  hearts melt?

Is any of it real,
Will the masks fall,
Of friends, foes, and strangers,
Will I see the real you?

I’m but one mind,
These are but my questions,
Imagine if I asked you too,
To open your mind?

What would you ask me,
If you could ask me anything,
Would you ask me who I am,
And if I could still dream?

If I was yours just for today,
Would you ask me questions,
Lying with me under the stars,
Would you answer mine too?